No 20 year old I know would listen to a 29 year old’s advise. I know I wouldn’t have.

I’m currenlty 29 and I feel like my twenties were spent learning life’s cruel lessons time after time. It would be tragic if I didn’t learn from them and it would have been great if 20 year old me would have received a heads up. This blog is to outline the most important lessons I’ve learnt over the past decade. It’s aimed at the 20 something youngset, but most importantly at the 29ish elder who will either nod in agreement or learn something.

Wadrobe

Never buy shoes from shops that do not specialize in shoes

This lesson is placed at the top of the list for a reason. Listen carefully…life is way too short for blisters.

I can’t even remember the amount of times I’ve bought beautiful shoes that I can never wear, because of the blisters they cause. It’s just not worth it.

I’m not saying buy ugly comfortable shoes. Shoes can be comfortable and beautiful if you purchase them at stores specialising in shoes. It’s as simple as that. Also, don’t be shy to splurge on a pair of shoes. They form the base of your outfit. They shape how you walk, present and carry yourself.

This is one lesson aka rule that I never break.

Quality over quantity

I’ve realized over the past decade that decluttering my life is super satisfying. How much stuff does one person really need. When I was in my early 20s my closet was so cluttered and filled with bits and pieces I’ve gathered over the years. It was also expanding on a daily basis. I would hold on to clothes like they were my children and I felt too sorry for some to give them away. What is the point of this?

After moving abroad, I packed 2 suitcases and I’ve never looked back. That is all I need. I’ve found the main pieces I want to wear everyday. When a piece needs to be replaced I simply go to the shop and look for something similar.

I’m not saying limit your style now and just replace your clothes - I’m saying find what looks good on you, what do you reach for in the morning first and stick to those.

I read somewhere a while ago that - only keep in your closet what you would buy today.

A classic wardrobe goes a long way

I use to have quite a unique and wacky style. I had so much fun with it. Some outfits worked, however, and some really didn’t.

It meant that I was always bored with my clothes and I was always trying to keep up with fashion which meant more more more…

Because I was always shopping and I wasn’t really earning anythgin yet, I would buy relatively cheap clothing to fill this need for more.

I’m in a place now where I’ve realised that buying tons of clothes for cheap makes you look cheap. My phylosophy now is to buy an expensive piece of timeless clothing that looks good, feels good and fits perfectly which will last. Surprisingly it’s cheaper this way.

Think and feel before you buy

I use to get a lot of buyer’s remorse.

Buyer's remorse is the sense of regret after having made a purchase. —Wiki

Somehow when you’re in the shop you think you need another black dress, but when you get home you realise that you already have 4.

I’ve stopped buying on impulse. I don’t mean that I don’t go shopping when I don’t need anyting. I mean I don’t just buy without using my head.

Why do I want this? Is it an emotional buy?
Do I have something that goes with it?
Do I need it?
Is it quality? Will it last? Is it a classic item?
Do I have the money right now for it?

I know what you’re thinking. I will never buy anything if I have to answer all theses questions and that is actually true.

These questions have prevented me from purchasing so many buyer’s remorse type items and I’m better off for it.

If you can, I recommend going shopping without buying. Go home! Think about it! If you still want the items the next day then you know its the right purchase. Usually when you walk away and forget about it, it’s not worth it.

The rule here is that if you bought an item and you don’t immediatly want to wear it when you get home or the next day, then the item is not for you so retrun it.

Dress appropriately for work

This is a simple and short lesson. Don’t dress like a student when you start working. No one wants to see your upper legs or lower back or bra strap. If you want to succeed with respect, don’t do it!

Travel

Don’t buy souveniers, buy experiences

Sure, we’re all tempted by the countless souveniers when traveling - especially when it’s your first time. This lesson is not implying to avoid souveniers all togehter, it’s just advising you to be smart about it.

You can buy souveniers that are stylish and usuable once you get back OR you can buy souveniers that are pretty much junk and will clutter your life back home. Purchase wisely. E.g of a good purchase - blue and white tile style hot plates from Portugal. E.g of a bad purchase - Eiffil tower key chains from Paris

I recommend spending your money on experiences instead. Experiences will never clutter your life and you can never go wrong with purchasing it. They stay with you forever.

Even my worst or most expensive experience I remember until today. E.g Expensive Gondollo ride in Venice, Italy. I’ve never regretted doing an activity even if it was expensive. I do, however, regret not do some activities while abroad. E.g Cappadocia, Turkey hot air balloon.

Don’t think you’ll get to come back and do it, you most likely won’t

As I mentioned above, I regret not riding hot air balloon in Cappadocia, Turkey. At the time I felt like it was way too expensive and that I’ve already been on a hot air balloon ride. I only realised much too late that the hot air balloon is one of the major things to do in Cappadocia.

I’ve been travelling with a number of people with different attitudes. Some always feels like “Ag, I feel like I’ll be back here someday to do it” and others, like me realise that you most likely won’t.

Grab the oppertunity or you’ll regret it!

Career

Never go for something you don’t want

This section is self explanatory. Don’t apply for a job that you don’t really want. Don’t go for a guy that you kind of like. Either your feelings or someone else’s will get hurt in the process. Life is too short. Live deliberately!

Recruiters are not your friends

It’s taken me a decade to figure this one out. Recruiters are not your friend. Yes, they can help you find your dream job and yes, some of them are really nice people. This lesson is to point out that they do work for commission and that they don’t always have your best interest at heart. If they don’t work for the company that you’re applying for, be wiery and alert.

Life

Gain as many skills as you can, you’ll be surprised at what skills you’re thankful for later in your life

OK, so maybe when you’re 20 you don’t want to learn how to knit, but I promise you that having a skill like that can only benefit you in your life later.

The thing is that you don’t loose skills. Yes, perhaps you get rusty, but you could pick it up fast again.

Having these random skills makes you interesting and you never know when they will become handy.

Move if you’re not happy (from boyfriends to jobs)

Seems obvious, right? So many people get this one wrong though. Don’t be the kind of person that just accepts their fate.

Have big dreams and focus achieving them

I use to live like a jelly fish. I always felt like I was doing things because the world pushed me into that direction. From my study choice to my first job.

This was until I decided I wanted to move abroad. It took dedication and without it, I would never have made it. Since then, I’ve realised that you can’t be a jelly fish if you want to live out your dreams. So live deliberatly!